Remain

God's word has this really magical way of tying up every loose end of my little life into the truth that is and will always be His love for me. I saw that shine through today stronger than I have in a long time.

So sit back, I've got a story to tell:

Sometime about five years ago, I had a very vivid dream and I believe to this day that even though I didn't fully understand it then, God's voice was the narrator.
In the dream I was in a large van on my way to a picnic at the bottom of a mountain. I was heading there with some people I considered to be spiritual role-models at the time. I knew that my husband didn't really care to go, but I had the feeling that this was something I didn't want to miss, and so I went. I'm not sure if we actually hiked that mountain, but I think we did.
On our way back, we saw my husband on the side of the road. He was struggling to climb a significantly smaller hill than the mountain I had just been to. So I got out and tried to help him, but he fell. Now, under natural circumstances, this wouldn't have been a big deal because of the size of the hill, but in the dream he started to die! I, feeling helpless, looked at him hoping for some sort of instruction about what he needed me to do, but sadly I watched him wither away.

I have always felt that God was telling me not to go chasing after the hype of Christianity; But know that my battles were going to be fought alongside my spouse, even if they seemed insignificant at the time.

It's easy when you're young and passionate about serving, to feel like the "God thing" could be your claim to fame. Let it be known, He is the one we make famous through our gifts and our serving.

The truth is that I've got a lot of little hills in my life that I need to conquer. And fortunately, God gave me a very strong man to stand beside me, help me up and give me some cold, hard facts when needed. That's the guy I need by my side on those little hills, when I feel like it's not even worth the bother. When I think that somehow I can go around it instead of over it and just worry about the mountains.

So hear me in this- I'm an ENFP. Spirituality is more real to me than my next meal. I don't even have to think about some things that might seem a little bizarre, because it just feels natural to BE spiritual. In fact sometimes I have to really guard myself from false teachings because I'm quick to trust without question. I'd say that my hubby is pretty opposite of me in this way. He knows God, believes God, his hope is in God. He wants to hear God's voice and he wants to make God centered choices. But MAN he has a hard time showing it. I want to jump into ministry head first and he is like "don't spend too much time at church." And so, sometimes I go on the defensive, feeling like our priorities are not in line. I'm pretty sure I said something like "I want to smack you in the head with a Bible right now.." just a few days ago. Yeah.. I did. That was effective. Not.

But today, as I dove into the last week of bible study reading for the class I'm currently taking, God smacked me over the head with His word.

John 15 Talks about God's way of shaping our hearts to be more like His. Cutting off all that does not bear fruit and pruning all the things that do, so they can be MORE effective.

That's hard to hear. Even the good stuff is going to take a painful process before it can really start producing.

But over and over again as I read, I just kept hearing those 3 little words:

Remain in Me

I have to stop trying to make everyone around me fit into my mold of "being spiritual." I don't want to stop. I want to keep pushing it because I'm happy here. But that's not what God is speaking. He is saying love each other. If anything ever had the power to get through to people, it's love. And I do not say that as a means of manipulating people, (because it can do that too, but it will backfire because it's not genuine.) But remain in Him. Remain in Him. Remain in Him. Remain in Him.  

Lindsay

Our Snowy February Day

This is a story about a mama who did something for perhaps the very first time. 

She planned ahead. 

our library loot!

The two times a year that it snows in New Mexico, everybody talks about it. We cancel everything and hole up in our houses because we do not know how to drive in the snow. So, when I heard that a "storm" was on its way this week, I figured I should run (drive) to the library and stock up on some books to keep us happy at home.

I'll use any excuse to read children's books, actually. They're pretty much my favorite.

Clearly we didn't stray from the R-S shelves. I had a 2-year-old running around during after-school hours. We had to keep it short. 

Except I forgot my library card. Ahem- I don't know where it is. Luckily, Ira saved the day! His was tucked away in his car seat, where he left it the day we got it. Take that! librarian. 

So this afternoon, after a long winter's nap, we had a book fest. 

Ira wanted a picture with his favorite. 

I just want to say that I was against the whole idea of this book. It's a parody of Curious George by H.A. Rey and that is treading sacred ground in my mind. But he insisted on taking it, so I caved. Opinions aside, I will not deny my son the joy of finding a book he wants to read. 

You win some, you lose some. 

I'm still winning because he loves books!

Even Rey joined in the fun! He's the fuzziest cuddliest lion I know and sometimes he gives rides through the living room. This is the stuff I LOVE about being a mama. Building up a world of silliness and imagination. I do in hopes that, when the world tries to crush their spirit, they will remember that ordinary life can be magical.

Happy winter! 

Lindsay

Rey is our friend. He hangs out in the boys room and eats monsters. Nothing gets past him.

13 FREE Wifey Gestures

It's February! Not only the month in which we celebrate Valentines Day, but also the month of my favorite man's birthday. So it should come as no surprise that I always want to do a little extra to make him feel loved this time of year. But, for those of us who share all our finances, it can be really tricky to surprise your spouse. So here's some little ideas. There's 13, so you could do one a day until Valentine's Day, if you so choose.

1. Write a steamy note. Literally. When the mirror fogs from the shower, write a little something with your finger. It's a nice little surprise when he gets out of the shower the next day.
2. Make him his favorite dinner. Just because. We all know the way to a man's heart, but only you know what meal gets to his!
3. Put the phone/ computer/ tablet down and just listen! Be present in the conversation.
4. Encourage. Remind him that you appreciate the things he does. Tell him how able you know he is.
5. Stop. Nagging. We all do it, but let's let them off the hook a bit, okay?
6.  Send a sweet note with his lunch. He may not find it for a week, but he'll still love it.
7. Give him a break. Think about planning your Valentine's Date this year.
8. Plan on breakfast. Get up and start off the day with some good family time, pancakes and coffee.
9. Do something he likes. Instead of shopping, think fishing/ hiking/ football. Whatever he likes. No complaints.
10. Tell him a secret. Let your wall down a little, it's part of intimately sharing everything.

11. Give a mini shoulder massage. 

12. Give him some quiet. Take the kiddos out for a bit, he could probably use it just as much as you. 

13. Pray for him. Don't pray that he changes, pray that he listens for God. Then sit back and trust them both. You may be surprised how good life is when you stop worrying. 

Happy February! 

Lindsay

Idols and Altars

Actual wall in Jerusalem- image from here

I've started off 2014 on a much better note than most previous years. Our church has encouraged everyone to fast and get into the word on a daily basis, and I've happily done so. Not from food btw. This mama needs that energy source right now. Anyhow, I've been so excited to open the word every day and fall in love with this amazing story and its brilliant Author.

{ you can check out the reading plan we're using here. I like that it doesn't follow a typical pattern and many times I've seen things line up through the different chapters. Don't feel the need to make up for lost time, either. Just start the date you want to start and if you miss a day, pick up the next day. No guilt!}

So- Exodus 20:22-26 the LORD is giving Moses clear instruction on building the Altar. Then He says this:

If you make an altar of stones for me,

do not build it with dressed stones, 

for you will defile it if you use a tool on it. 

Verse 25

What a profound statement of the character of God. It's like He's saying, "don't try to fix my creation." 

And how many times do we miss that? We get busy being Marthas in ministry or even in our lives at home; trying to make everything look perfect, when all along He thought it already was. Who are we trying to impress? the one who knows our thoughts surely isn't surprised by our attempt at perfection. His love for us doesn't change because of it. 

I think we do this, not only to our outward, tangible selves, but in our hearts and with our plans. I'm not saying don't plan, but let's not try so hard to make everything "the way it should be." And believe me, my OCD self cringes at the thought! Stop fussing over time tables- If you're single, BE SINGLE. And embrace that in your life. If you're married, stop trying to change things about your spouse! He's the one God intended for you, embrace him! The problem with trying to be picture perfect is that we can't see the perfect picture. 

Can we all focus on letting the Author write. I know how much I hate people reading over my shoulder, because.. my work's not done. Every time we try to paint a picture of our future or take control over a situation we have NO control over- we do that. We read over the shoulder of our sweet Creator. As if we don't trust Him or think it's good enough. Let's stop. 

Let's build our altars out of beautifully imperfect stones. Ones shaped through the hard times. Stones that chipped and scratched their way into our story. And on top of all those stones, let's lay down our will. Sacrifice our need to feel put together or prove something to people who have little to do with our journey. 

He's still working, ladies! He is shaping and molding. If He were done, we'd be sitting right beside Him. Trust the process and wait and see- your ashes will be made beautiful. And soon we will all start to see the vision He had all the while.

lindarella

New Year, New Focus

I'm not one for resolutions. If you want to change something in your life, there's no need to wait for a certain day or date to do it. I do, however, believe in seasons. And boy am I ready for a new season. Life is pretty good right now, not much to complain about. It's just.. that stirring feeling. Change.
It's sounds so good, doesn't it?
So since I'm trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I have very little ability to change my circumstances, I'm going to change my focus in 2014. Instead of making it through each day, wondering when the glorious day will be that we have our own space again? Or when the boys will be more self sufficient so I can spend time on things like writing or baking? I'm going to focus this year around organization.
I work best under pressure. I have been kind of wingin' the whole mom thing. I'd like to change that. I'd like to feel more confident that I can have productive days and not have to skip out on the things I need for my own sanity's sake.
First things first. As a homemaker, even in someone else's home, I want to change the dynamic a bit. More positive attitudes, more lightheartedness. So I sat down and thought up some House Rules.

Print House Rules

BTW this looks really great on Kraft paper. It would also work well on yellow.  

My kids can't read yet. These are totally for the grown-ups around here! My hubby is so on board with these, and truthfully, in the week or so I've had them up, I see a change in the way we speak to one another. 

We're setting an example of people who can admit when they're wrong and not worry so much about the little things, and that has made for a great start to our year. 

This is my first ever time sharing a printable, so if it's glitchy- I'm still learning. Please comment below if you have trouble with it. I would much rather fix it than have my work copied. Please give credit where it is due here :) HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

lindsay

What to Wear to a Wedding, and Why it Actually Matters

At 17, I was so excited to plan my own wedding. I had thought about all the things that I wanted it to be. Magical would be the best description. Even though some of the details of my special day didn't turn out to be all I had imagined (surprise! planning a wedding in 3 months does not usually match a Disney fairytale kind of wedding), it was magical. Most of what I remember from that day is the smile plastered on my face, not because I had to smile but because I was genuinely happy.
The thing I hadn't thought about in all my planning, though, was how people would show up.

Apparently it's a good thing we didn't spring for a big fancy ballroom because the minute the guests arrived, it would have snapped me back into the reality that a lot of people just don't care.

Those pictures last forever. For at least the first three years of our marriage, people would ask to look at them whenever they visited. So yes, Auntie in the ridiculously low-cut dress, all my friends and family have seen that more than once.

I have been to a fair share of weddings since throwing my own, and I must admit, I'm the guest inspecting everyone's attire. I know that's not what the day is about, but during the 45 minute photo session, what am I to do but look at the strange(rs) around me. Can you believe that, at my mother-in-law's wedding, the FEMALE officiant had the nerve to show up in a cream colored dress!

Take a look at this list from what not to wear. I have literally seen every one of these, except maybe bell bottoms, at a wedding.

This kind of hits spot-on what I find appropriate, except I think some women can pull off a nice outfit with dressy pants as long as that makes sense for the venue, season and the couple. I still prefer dresses.

There are so many useful tips out there, if you just take a moment to look into it. The fact is, what you wear says so much about you. If you show up looking flashy or overtly sexy, people see you as desperately seeking attention. You're taking away from the bride's day and that's just rude.

If you show up too casual, it comes off as though you don't really care to be there and you weren't expecting it to be a special occasion. Any wedding, regardless of the venue, is special. It's important to the couple. For you to be invited, it should be a special day for you as well. Don't bother showing up if you don't feel that way about it.

I hope that this can give you a little perspective before attending your next wedding. It's not about trying to impress, it's about being respectful to the time and effort put into the planning and showing your support to the bride and groom.

Lindsay

Apple Outfit Of The Day: Faking Curves

As some of you may know, my size has been an issue for most of my life. I've tried beating myself up about it. I've tried blame. I've tried tireless attempts to change my body, only to realize that it's not going to happen until I'm ready to make a life change.

I feel like I'm getting there, but in the meantime, I have to find a place where I'm ok being myself.

I'm an "apple shape" or, as I like to say, I have the profile of Winnie the Pooh. Not as endearing as it seems. The most frustrating part about BEING an apple shape, is that it feels like you're the only one. I mean, you can't wear what slender women are wearing even though you don't have hips and a large behind. Plus size seems to cater to: Hourglass/ pear shaped women, and the over-50s crowd.
Pencil skirts, forget it. A-line skirt.. try finding one in your size that looks flattering or one you can wear at your natural waist that's not too short. Sheath. Um no. And that's not even thinking about jeans.

It's a difficult place to be when you want to get healthy but feel so bad about yourself that you don't even want to try. I feel like my apple sisters could use some help! That's why I'm launching this new series, Apple Outfit Of the Day.

You will all have to forgive me if this is an odd picture, I've got to do what I can on my own here.

I want to make a point of saying that we're not trying to fool anyone into believing we're super skinny. I'm not, no matter what I wear.

Part one of dressing better is acceptance. I used to dress in clothes that didn't fit, thinking that squeezing into a tight Tee would make people believe I was smaller. It did the opposite. When I started to dress differently, close friends began asking if I had lost weight. This was POST baby! I reluctantly said "thanks, but I think I'm just dressing better."

Now that it's fall I want to talk about something we can all use as a tool in our wardrobe.
Layers!   

We hear a lot about layers and it is vital to understand that they can be done comfortably and casually. A lot of times, especially during the warmer parts of the year, I will wear a fitted tank top under whatever shirt I'm wearing that day. For one, it smoothes me out a little, but it also adds contrast. Today, I'm doing a comfy tank with a cardigan. I don't like blazers, but if it suits your work environment, go for it! there are a lot of soft cotton options out there, too, for more casual days.

Notice in the picture above, I'm not doing a magenta on magenta. It's ok to be bright! don't shy away from color in hopes that people will notice your body less. The contrasting colors add dimension and interest. Allow your clothes to show people your personality. With this cardigan I am able to fake some curves. Here are some ways you can, too-

1. make sure it fits. Going too big on a jacket or cardigan will age your look and give you a big balloon effect. It will likely be too long also, which will only make your shape seem more awkward.

2. Think about leaving it unbuttoned. If I close it up, it's going to hug all the parts of me that I'm trying to mask.

3. Find one that pulls in at your natural waist, or try belting it in place. If you have ever studied art or photography, you know that where the arrows point, the eye follows. Create triangular shapes to draw peoples eyes to your best features. In this example, the lines of the cardigan draw the eye to my chest area. AWAY from my dreaded tummy area.

4. By wearing jeans with some flare, I'm also creating balance. Because my waistline is wider than my hips and my legs are small, I have to anchor my outfit.

5. It's for the sake of balancing out that I also try and stay away from super high heels. You do not want to look like a marshmallow on a stick.

I sincerely hope this helps those of you out there that are dealing with the same issues. This really is about feeling comfortable in your own skin. If you are spending much of your time pulling and tugging and trying to hide, then you are living in a place of emotional torture. Remember:

your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth to God. I Peter 3:3-4

Let people see your capacity to love, that's beauty.
-lindsay